Confession Tuesday

I confess it's Tuesday again and I can hardly believe it.  Summer is spinning by and while yesterday I was woken up by a foghorn (it seems the clouds had fallen from the sky and stolen the sun), I have hope the summer weather will return soon.

Since it's confession time, let's just get to it.  I have had a lot on my mind, though we'll see what I remember.

To the confessional...

I confess I have been feeling incredibly creative lately.  It's that really powerful creative feeling where I feel as if I can do anything.

I never know when or how this feeling arrives, but when it does, I try to hold onto it as long as I can.

Right now, I'm in the middle of it.  I'm not sure what brought it on (it definitely wasn't watching The Proposal with Sandra Bullock for the 3rd time, but maybe it was watching the documentary Stolen, or reading Neruda).  Whatever it is, it's there.  A magical "beginner's mind" feeling when everything feels new and exciting and inspiring.

If I could bottle this feeling, I would.   I'd call it Inspire or Muse.  There is a part of me that wonders if my Neruda dreams will return.  I will let you know if they do.


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I confess I'm on the second proof of my manuscript and really impressed with White Pine Press!

It looks beautiful on the page and the details they've added to the book are wonderful.  It is wild for me to think that my book is getting ready to be published and that fall will arrive with leaves and this book.  It still amazes me.

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Also, yesterday after a long and crazy day of whoknowswhat, I confess I sat down at my computer as I had written "work on my non-fiction work for 45 minutes" on my To-Do list and lost myself in it for 2 hours.

I do not know how I started a memoir type book, but I did.  While it is still too young for me to name it or even explain what it's about (I'm still learning that myself), I'll tell you I share a lot in this book about internal struggles I have as a writer, a mother, and a wife.

I'm beyond 30,000 words and no, I don't have an agent or publisher yet, but this is something I just feel I need to write and I'm not sure why.  But it needs to come out even though I'm not sure of the life this manuscript will lead.

On my walk tonight I wondered if it would be Gwyneth Paltrow or Uma Thurman who would play me in the movie version of it.  I decided it would be Uma since she also thought she looked like one of the big-eyed girls on those creepy 70's painting that were everywhere when I was growing up.  I had that same thought too.

I confess it's ridiculously optimistic or ridiculously naive to imagine who will play me in my currently unfinished and unpublished memoirish book, but this is how my happy creative mind operates.  Nothing is too big or off limits.

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I confess the poem I'm working on is about a monkey painting.  That sounds weird to write, but it's true.

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I confess I'm naming my poetry shed (aka poetry barn).  I never really gave my writing studio a real name and it deserves one.  I want it to be Neruda inspired.  This I know.

I will let you know if I come up with anything.

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I confess I spent the last week doing house chores and painting our deck.  Painting is hard work and  I somehow managed to sunburn my ears.  I am obviously the whitest person on earth as who does that kind of thing?  Call me Powder (remember that movie?)


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While walking my dog and listening to an audio book I got spooked by a sprinkler.  I thought it was a deer jumping at me.

As I said, I've had a very nutty imagination lately.  I am thankful I am a writer when it comes around, though being afraid of sprinklers seems a bit extreme.

But there you are.  I've been in my head this last week, imagining future books made into movies, seeing water as wildlife, and wondering what to do next.

I'll name my writing studio, work on a couple projects, be grateful the creativity is here (and even in a summer month!) and hope it stays.

Amen.

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