Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Confession Tuesday - The Haunted Armoire Edition

Dear Reader,

It's been one week and two full nights sleeps without a visit from the 2 hours-of-insomnia Fairy.  I have a lot on my mind, so let's just begin.

To the confessional--

I confess after WAY too many years (eighteen, I think) I am getting rid of my haunted armoire.

Hello, I must be going...
For the last eighteen years, I have had sleep issues that I have blamed on this armoire.  From waking up in the middle of the night searching for medicine (I don't have or take) in the armoire to believing a keep a small bird in there that I've forgotten to feed.

I use the haunted armoire to keep my lingerie and pajamas in.  So you can only imagine what my family thinks to find me standing in front of it at 2 am digging through my bras asking questions like, "Do I take medicine?"  And saying random things like, "Oh my God, I've forgotten about the bird."

You may wonder why someone would keep a haunted armoire for so long, especially one that I have such a strange midnight relationship with.

Well, because as much as I've blamed my sleep issues on this armoire, I guess I really haven't believed it's been the real cause of it.  I mean, can you imagine me telling my doctor that I have terrible sleep issues (and have since I was 24) and it's not because of anxiety or stress, but because I purchased a haunted armoire in 1993 that brings me over to at night searching for medicine or birds.  She would think I was looney.

So I've kept it, for the last 18 years believing it's not you, Armoire, it's me.  

But this weekend I visited my friend Nancy Pagh (who is an incredible poet by the way--here's her book, No Sweeter Fat) and I went to sleep in her armoireless room and slept for 10 hours straight.  No waking up, no insomnia, no trying to feed dead birds that don't exist.  It was magical.

I texted my husband from Nancy's house, "When I get home, we must move the haunted armoire out of our bedroom."  When I came home, the had already moved the armoire  out.  And for the past 2 nights I have slept.

I now however am taking the next big step, I sent out an email this morning to my friends that says my haunted armoire is up for grabs or it's going to our local donation center this Friday.  Yes, I am breaking up with my armoire (and I should have done this YEARS ago).

Oh and I did include the details that the armoire is in fact, haunted, or has weird energy that makes you think that birds and medicine live in it, but they already knew that--it's not as if I haven't spent the last eighteen years talking about this.

So I feel as if I'm moving on.  I cannot wait to get to it out of my house completely.

I told my daughter I was thinking of dragging down to the corner and putting a FREE sign on it and she said that we'll probably look out window and see all our neighbors looking for medicine in it and not understanding why.  Which made me laugh.  Which made me realize I have put way too much energy in this armoire and while I love how beautiful it is, it really needs to go.




  1. Good for you! This post made me laugh a bit, but I can understand how bad energy from something can affect a person! So glad to hear you will be sleeping better now!

  2. And why have we seen no poems about this? ;)

  3. Bernie-- I know, it's a kind of hilarious relationship I have with this piece of furniture. ;-)

    Michael-- VERY good question! maybe soon...

  4. $25 on the sign, not FREE. Someone will steal it. But it will be gone, which is what you want, right?

    Word verification: sumber... fitting, I think!

  5. Yes, stolen is good (in this case!) ;-)

    Actually, the new update is a friend of mine who works for an environmental nonprofit is going to take it to use in their auction! I'm thrilled. It will be gone and it will raise money for an organization I love.

  6. You havegot to write a story about it. Or a short novel. The Haunted Armoire of Puget Sound.

    I think it has real possibilities.

  7. Lyle-- I really should! thanks for suggesting it.

    Brenda-- Tilda is still in the ceiling of the guest room. You should stay a night and meet her. ;-)


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