Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Confession Tuesday

Today's a writing day for me, so let's get right to the confessing this morning...

Focus: Things that Amaze

1) This is the last week I have in my 30's as this Friday, I will somehow manage to become 40 (seriously, I don't know how this happened, well, I do. But I don't.) My twenties were all about figuring out who I was and what I wanted to do. My 30's were about having a child and figuring how to balance being a mother and a writer. My 40's? I hope they are not about figuring anything out, but just being.

A friend of mine turned 40 last year and I asked her what she thought of it. She said she was looking forward to it because she would no longer be in her *late* thirties, but in her *early* forties. She said it kind of felt as if she was going to be the young one in the group again. She has a very positive outlook in the world

2) Sometimes what is supposed to be bad news turns out to be good news, and sometimes I'm always amazed how things fall into place. Of course, things can also be a disaster and I'm completely amazed at that too.

3) Twitter. I don't understand what Twitter is. Why does one Twitter? I don't think I get it. What's it for? Is it a mini blog or sentences about your day? Should I continue to be Twitterless? (That almost sounds nasty to me.) Anyone want to share?

4) I'm always amazed when I'm completely unaware of something then to find out it exists and there's this whole other world that others know about and I am hanging out my laundry and washing my dishes by hand. Twitter is that. Facebook was that. For the longest time people kept talking about Tivo and I thought the Jackson 5 were getting back together.

5) The night sky. The red sunrises over the Cascades. Seeing the same heron near the mudflats and the kingfisher on the powerline. That I can turn a knob and get hot water. How houses are built or bigger, bridges. Someone's path from point A to point B. That the voting booths *weren't* rigged. That at anytime in your life, if you really want to, you can call a "do-over."



  1. I'm for do-overs. The age thing is a big problem for me. (mine-not yours) I think I was about 26 when it really started to hit me. I'm sure it's the whole mortality thing. But I think it bothered me way befor it ever impacts most people.

    Your friend who turned forty last year has an awesome attitude about it. One I wish I could embrace.

    And you are not alone on twitter.

  2. Happy birthday! I wonder what it's like to turn 40...though I really don't want to know right now ;)

    Re: #2 -- does this have to do with that book prize you mentioned earlier?

    I don't understand Twitter either; I've seen Twitter feeds on others' blogs ("Follow me on Twitter," etc) but I've never really known what it is either. So you're not alone.

    Oh, and I love night skies and red sunrises.

  3. You know I remember feeling really old when I turned eighteen.

    My fingers no longer looked "young;" it was something about the indentations on the knuckles.

    As I look towards fifty - more soon than I care to share - you still seem young to me.

    I agree about how houses are built. As the wind and the rain lash my windows I am amazed that its possible to be warm and dry tonight.

  4. Hi Michael,

    Interesting about it happening at 26. When I was 24 or 25, I was so convinced I was going to die I bought a 2-seat convertible. (There really is no sense to this except that I figured if I was going to die, I might as well drive the car I want.) ;-) So I know there are some weird things happening in our 20's.

    Oddly, it bothers me less as I get older--I think I may have this belief of the higher the number, the more power you have.

    I did have a problem turning 30 though (I actually cried...good one).

    When I told my best friend I didn't want to turn 30 she said, "Don't ever say that because it's better than the alternative." I have never said it again.

    Thanks for your note, Michael.

    Maya-- #2-- No (but I wish!) It has to do with plans changing and how sometimes we're expecting or planning for a certain outcome or trying to make arrangements and it just doesn't happen. And sometimes I'll expect it not be good. But it is. Or I get what should be bad news, but for some reason, I'm relieved.

    For me, I realize that just because it's change or billed as "bad news," doesn't necessarily mean it is. It's taken me a long time to figure this out.

    And I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesn't get Twitter! Here's to a year of fantastic skies and sunrises.


    How great to have note from you! (yay!) You do not even look close to 50. I was just remarking on that. You are the perfect 40-something year old...actually, you will have your 1/2 birthday on my birthday. (Let's celebrate! oh wait, we are!)

    Stay warm and dry tonight. It's the kind of evening where we are thankful for what keeps the outside out.

    Be well and see you soon. Thank you for your note.

  5. Happy almost birthday! I am almost older too. I struggle with it, but I love the wisdom and perspective and strength I know I am gathering. And I think of a Dar Williams song where she sings, "I'm so glad that you finally made it here,/You thought nobody cared, but I did, I could tell,"/And "This is your year," and "It always starts here," /And oh, "You're aging well."

  6. Alison, thanks! I'm a Dar fan and I enjoyed reading that.

    Of course, I've been thinking about that Bonnie Raitt song...

    "No matter how you tell yourself
    It's what we all go through
    Those lines are pretty hard to take
    When they're staring back at you"

    Actually, I'm feeling pretty good...but that song has been in my head.

    Thanks for you note.

  7. You make 40 beatuiful. Happy birthday! Here's wishing you good health and happiness this year. AND, wishing the best for your manuscript.

    I don't understand Twitter either. But Facebook--what did we do without Facebook?!?


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