Friday, February 12, 2010

Artist as Boss

So I had this great talk with Tatyana Mishel today about how there are two parts of me that sometimes battle-- the artist vs. the strict schoolteacher.

Tatyana & I talked about how many of have these two sides in us and with each person, it's different for which one is in control. We have one part of us that is wild with passion and creativity and another part that is more orderly and controlling.

I am a Capricorn with a Scorpio rising, which could be visualized as the woman CEO who is secretly wearing red lingerie under her gray suit.

The artist in me wants to create, to play, to say whatever she wants, to explore any interests and to live life in a way that offers creation, connection, and passion.

My strict schoolteacher side likes things a bit more orderly and structured and reminds me not to lose my head about things. She is the one who holds back, who makes lists, who wants focus focus focus, and who is not too forgiving. I know she wants the best for me, but she's pretty tough with the structure, control and micromanaging of things.

In most cases, I believe she's always a little more in control than my artist self. She is the workaholic father to my dreamer mother. She is the dog that watches the flock of sheep instead of the cat asleep in sun.

Tatyana asked me, "What would happen if you let the artist be boss? How would things be different?'

I thought that was such an insightful questions. What would happen if I let my artist be boss?

So, I'm going to try it out for a while and see what happens (I promise to report any wild, crazy episodes, but knowing myself I'm guessing this will be few and far between, but maybe?)

My question to you is? Who rules in your own self-- your artist or your more structured self? Have you ever tried to turn it around and let the other one lead?

I'm really intrigued by this idea.

I'm giving the artist the lead for a while, we'll see if the dance changes or if I'm just falling into the audience because of my stiletto heels. Either way, it will keep things interesting. I'll let you know how it goes...
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