Friday, September 28, 2007
What Cures Us
I'm feeling better about things. Thanks to everyone for their comments, ideas, and understanding. I think as writers many times we go through these hazy places in order to "find ourselves" or at least discover a little more what we are seeking.
Jeannine had a great idea about not trying to force my writing into a 9-3 schedule, which is what I was trying to do. She said "it goes against most writing books," but really, my best writing is done later at night and be best editing done during the day. So in that respect, I'm going to be a little easier on myself. I was trying to treat my writing life as a 9-3 job and while there were a few positives with that, overall, it wasn't working.
I guess I am the writer who writes best in the cracks of the day. My best work has come when most of the neighborhood is sleeping. My ideas appear when my hands are full of dandelions or I am two miles from home with my i-Pod and golden retriever. I realize as much as I think I could be happy being June Cleaver with a slight attitude, my life has always had writing in it. Thought I did make a pan of Apple Brown Betty and it did help.
I guess this week (well, these last few weeks since my daughter began school) have been a learning time for me. To figure out what works, and what doesn't. I have quit a poets group I belong to online because the supportive feeling I first felt there seems to have turned. I am thankful to have a great in-person writing group and a great online group as well. I'm paying more attention to what I give attention to. These small choices make a difference.
I'm sure in six months or a year, I'll be struggling with similar issues, but for now, I'm just going to try doing what feels right and relaxing into the pain (as they say, though I'm not technically in pain), just a little uncomfortable, just a few growing aches as I figure out what to do next.